Imagining Rebecca lying in my bed was just like watching porn as a teenager. I had to hide my sexual fantasies in the morning shower, just as I hid those x-rated videos within folder within folder in the deepest recesses of my computer’s hard drive. We’d been close colleagues, even work friends, from the start, although I had technically become her managing boss more than 3 years ago.
Imagining Nick kissing me was something I couldn’t dare give myself the luxury of; he was my boss and I had a boyfriend who loved me. But, nearly every night my dreams defied me by showing me images of Nick, with his face and his sweaty torso on my breasts, and the sensation of him inside me…until I’d wake with a start.
Rebecca had immediately been impressive when she joined his team; bright and funny, hardworking and able to handle herself ably at an office where stress (and tempers) can run high.
She was the kind of woman you immediately thought about as part of your future, one that would be the kind of partner you’d never be tempted to stray from and would share your professional goals, but also wit and warmth. The woman who, when you need it most, makes love without stopping. And even more dangerous, the kind of woman that ignites these sorts of fantasies and more at all hours of the day and night…
The houselights went down and the curtain parted to reveal three voluptuous and glittering female figures. Two lay with fans at the edges of the curtain and another stretched half-naked on a sofa. I wanted to see the reaction on Nick’s face, but as the music started, the audience shifted for a better look and I lost him in the crowd.
Startled from my daydream, I groaned. I knew it was a bad idea to bring the whole company to a burlesque show as soon as it was suggested. But, Christmas dinners are already complicated to plan, and expensive, not to mention how many people drop out when they realize their attendance isn’t mandatory. So, here we were, drinking much more quickly then we all should, just to get over our initial, joking discomfort.
In fact, I thought I could already note the disappearance of a few pairs. My mind flicked back to Rebecca, but I didn’t need the clink of my wedding ring against my glass to remind me that these thoughts could never move from fantasy to fact.
I let the three dancers relegate Rebecca to the back of my brain, and ordered a second, and then third Old Fashioned. The opening number, which had been lighthearted, ended, and was followed by a two dancer performance that employed latex corsets and moodier music for a much kinkier display. As one feigned at spanking her partner, I imagined joining them on stage for a demonstration…
It seemed like the crowd had thinned a bit, with people wandering to the upper balcony for the privacy afforded by watching the dancers without the head of HR at your elbow. I saw Nick then, and he looked fully absorbed in the show. No wonder, even my blood was reaching boiling point as I watched the dancers slowly reveal more of their skin while playing at seduction with each other.
I imagined myself up on stage, clothed in the same shiny black corset and thigh high stockings. Then wiggling playfully out of a black mini skirt to reveal not-very-much of a thong. …And then Nick, pushing that down my hips with his hands…
And, all of a sudden, those images evaporated when my cell phone vibrated; another message from Lucas to say his business dinner was as boring as expected. I silenced my phone and buried it deep within my bag.
I tried to focus on the show, but I kept catching glimpses of Rebecca watching the dancers intently, sometimes whispering to a coworker beside her. Now, it wasn’t a curvy blonde I saw on the stage but her lithe frame and black hair…
I imagined sitting center stage with my drink in hand, watching transfixed with lust as Rebecca gave me a private pole dance. She’d look at me with that challenging look of amused confidence, then wrap herself around the pole to reveal every part of her body I’d imagined in agonizing detail…
As the performers came back out for final bows to thunderous applause and some hoots and hollers, I turned to return to the bar, sitting at the side so I could continue to mull over my fantasy. It would be so simple; just sit at the side of the bar and have a drink with her, talk about the show and shake our heads, then to brush my hand along her thighs… to hold her by her thighs, those gorgeous thighs, and rip off her panties and lick and suck until she cried:
“Yes, Nick, fuck me! Fuck me like I’ve thought about you fucking me every day!”
“Looks like you sure enjoyed the show, eh Nick?” I said, while giving him an exaggerated wink.
“It was less of a disaster than I expected, yes. You want a drink before they cut off the tab? I feel like company generosity might soon run out, unless you think there’ll be an encore?” I said; motioning at the bottles not yet opened behind the bar.
“Another time, I just wanted to say goodbye before I took off.” I smiled at Nick, then turned and fished out my phone to text Lucas to be waiting and ready for me at home.