You meet someone, fall in love and then problems arise causing you two to part ways. It breaks your heart but some things have to be done. Lucky are the ones who stick with the ‘one’ forever.
Right, back to dealing with an ex boyfriend..
A bigger problem arises when either your ex turns out to be clingy; or worse still, you find it hard to move on. Every situation in life involves a couple of dos and don’ts, which whether we like or not, we have to follow. So if you feel like you’re in stuck in a similar problem then here’s what you can do, when you’re dealing with an ex boyfriend:
When The Boyfriend Won’t Let Go
Things are quite tricky when you’re dealing with an ex boyfriend who clings to you like a whining baby. No matter what you do, he just refuses to let go and move on with his life. And somewhere down the line his behaviour starts making you feel guilty for putting him through the mess. But just like you can train a little baby to stop crying when Mommy and Daddy leave for work, similarly you can do things that will help your ex come to terms with reality.
Be Very Clear
Sometimes you need to put your foot down and be blunt while saying ‘It’s over.’ Don’t beat around the bush to save his feelings from getting hurt. Be straightforward when dealing with an ex boyfriend like this, so that there is no confusion anywhere. Maybe that’s what he needs, to hear it straight from you.
Being in touch with an ex right after a breakup (especially if you are the one who called it off) is not a good idea. Be blunt and say that you will not answer his calls no matter how miserable he is. Even if it’s your birthday, tell him you do not want to be wished by him. Yes, it will break his heart, but drawing boundaries and cutting him out is important to give him space to move on.
If you think it will be difficult for him then don’t be afraid ask his friends for help (that is if you know them well). Ask them to keep him busy to help him move on. Ask them to not discuss anything about you or the relationship in front of him. That’s the fastest way to fix things, when you’re dealing with an ex boyfriend who won’t let go.
Block From Social Media
When you’re dealing with an ex boyfriend and you think he’s the kind to stalk you on Facebook or Instagram, don’t be afraid to block him. You have a right to your privacy and if you don’t want him to have access to your online material then feel free to block.
Don’t Get Weak
If you’re sure about the breakup and about not wanting to get back with him then be firm about it. There will be times when he’ll go weak and will contact you begging you to take him back, but stick to your decision. You might have to explain your reasons to him but do it firmly without getting weak.
Don’t Feel Guilty
Sometimes when dealing with an ex boyfriend, he keeps telling you that he’s miserable without you, and you start feeling guilty about it. In times like those, remember why you broke up in the first place and remind yourself why it was the right decision.
When You Can’t Move On
Well, dealing with an ex boyfriend when you’re like this is even trickier, because in case of a clingy ex you can still be normal in your life. But when you yourself can’t move on, it’s almost like having a fever which won’t go away no matter what. You start feeling crippled and helpless because you just can’t seem to get your mind to forget about him.
It might be hard dealing with an ex boyfriend when you feel like you can’t manage, but try to accept it as a reality and tell yourself that better things are waiting for you in life. Accept that it will be difficult because coming out of a relationship is never easy. Many of us think that we must be able to move on with the flick of a wand but accept that you’re only human and you will take your own time.
‘Out of sight, out of mind’ works every time! Tell him that you do not wish to be contacted by him and tell him that he should not answer your calls even if you contact him out of desperation.
Surround Yourself With Friends And Family
We often take our loved ones for granted and it is in times like these when we realize their true value. Know that the end of a relationship doesn’t mean you’re all on your own now. Your friends and family will always stand by your side to help you through it, so when dealing with an ex boyfriend, let them know what’s up and stick with them with full faith.
Binge Watch Shows And Movies
This is the most common method when dealing with an ex boyfriend you can’t seem to get over. Watch a lot of movies and TV shows to keep your mind occupied but remember to focus on comedy films rather than picking romantic or sad movies. Shows like ‘FRIENDS’, ‘How I Met Your Mother’ and ‘Community’ or even ‘Brooklyn Nine-Nine’ are perfect to make you forget your sorrows and give you a laughter fit.
Revenge Body Transformation
Well, I don’t know how much this works but I have definitely heard of a lot of men and women focusing on their bodies by working out and getting fit to develop their ‘Revenge Bod’. Even if you don’t wish to keep that as your reason for working out, remember that exercising releases happy hormones in the body known as ‘endorphins’ which help in relaxing the mind. And it works well, when dealing with an ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend.
Focus On Your Job And Connect With Lost Friends
One thing that happens when you’re in a serious relationship is that you lose touch with other friends in your life. Your boyfriend becomes your life and all your shopping, dining out, movie plans include him and only him. Now that he’s out of the picture, develop a healthy social life by getting in touch with everyone and also channeling your energies towards becoming the best version of your professional self.
We often think of the end of the relationship signals the end of life too. But that’s never a healthy thought process. Yes, relationships hold an important place in our lives because we are social beings after all, but there’s a lot more to our lives than just one relationship which just ended. Understand this when you’re dealing with an ex boyfriend, and help your ex understand it too. Not everything is meant to stay with you till the end. Some relationships only play out the way they do to teach us some valuable lessons.