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Valentine's Day Etiquette For Guys

With Valentine’s Day all but upon us, it’s important to remember that no matter how thoughtful you have been with your gifts or how much money you have spent, the thing that’s going to impress and ultimately win over you Valentine is you yourself. And that means being on your best behavior on this special day of love. Here’s how you can go about doing just that, while putting to rest the “modern day guys are all jerks” stereotype:


Many a time, the occasion of Valentine’s Day sees us trying to further a nascent affection, meaning that we don’t really know the other we’re trying to impress upon all that well. In such a case, it is best to stick to tried and tested gifts like a nice bottle of wine and a bouquet of fragrant roses. These gifts are not stale or played out, they’re symbols of romance for a reason.


Most women, unless they explicitly state otherwise, would like the guy to take the lead when it comes to Valentine’s Day, so do just that and don’t worry too much about what she wants to do or what specifics she enjoys; she wants to be taken out and made to feel special.


If the two of you are more comfortable with each other (read: have been talking a while) you could do well to invite her over and prepare her a special meal that the two of you could enjoy. Set the mood with scented candles and a pretty vase with pretty flowers. Just make sure to hand the flowers over to her first, before having a vase ready to put them in as the two of you get to enjoy dinner. And unless you burn the dinner real bad (in which case, you can always order pizza), she will appreciate the effort.


No matter what the two of you are like, how comfortable the two of you are, the best impression comes from a sharply dressed man which shows her that you mean business. If the occasion of Valentine’s has her seeing you in an old hoodie and jeans then she’ll know no matter how good things get between the two of you, this is all she can expect from you. And that’s not good.


Nails, hair, scratchy beard, itchy mustache… make sure to be in tip top shape when you see her, whether the two of you are heading out or whether she’s coming over. It may be the most basic of actions but its implications are far and wide. It shows her that she is dealing with a man that can and will take care of himself and respects himself and she will never respect a guy who can’t respect himself.


The two of you will talk over dinner, or drinks or at any point during your date, that’s the majority of what will happen, whether you move on to more intimate or physical things or not. It’s important to listen to what she has to say. Being distracted or disinterested will be a huge turn off for her, and the end of the night for the two of you. Instead, genuinely listen to what she has to say, and if she ventures too far into the realm of complaining or work related topics, gently steer the conversation towards something you’re more keen on talking about.


Chances are that if you’re somewhere far east or north in this country, you will get a chance to grab her coat for her, but other than that make the extra effort of opening the car door for her, pulling up a chair for her and all of the small actions that keep things interesting among couples. Don’t overdo it, and do it with a smile, and there’s no chance it will be construed as anything but an adorable attempt at chivalry, winning you major brownie points in the process.


And she will love you for it. What do we mean? Well, let’s just say that on most normal days dressing up in Arabian attire and serenading your girlfriend on the street with your guitar would end with you spending the night in jail, but in Valentine’s Day it’s perfectly acceptable. Just be wary of sanskaari squads. If you’re really passionate about her, do let her know.


That means: don’t pick fights with other drunk males, don’t get too drunk yourself, remove yourselves from any situation before things get out of hand instead of trying to prove your manhood in any way, always be in control of the situation, be alert, attentive and not zoned out – all of these things let her know that you’re a stand up guy, a sensible head on strong shoulders.


We could have just as easily said don’t force anything, but you were never going to do that were you? The reality is that no matter how much you have spent on that expensive dinner or those tickets or anything else, you cannot expect “anything” to come from this date and day, and if you do, you’re approaching it wrong. Plus it comes off as desperate and low and will seriously jeopardize all of the good work you have done so far.


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